


Recall

by Sasshii



Category: SKE48
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-22
Updated: 2014-02-22
Packaged: 2018-01-13 10:36:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,509
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1223167
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sasshii/pseuds/Sasshii
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Yuka's made her fill of mistakes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Recall

White. All she could see was white. She clenched her eyes shut, feeling the pressure build up in her skull. The ringing in her ears becoming unbearable.

“Ni…shi…”

She opened her eyes again, the white slowly waning from her vision.

“Yuka.”

The ringing stopped, she released a breath of relief.

“Yuka.” The voice repeated a little firmer.

She turned her head towards the source of the sound, a blurry face a few inches away from hers.

“Yuka, can you hear me?”

She tried to open her mouth and answer but the words never left her throat. She closed her eyes again, the dull throbbing in the back of her head lulling her to sleep.

“Will she be okay, doctor?” A female asked, turning away from the sleeping girl.

“I wouldn’t worry, Ms. Yagami.” The doctor placed a comforting hand on her shoulder, “Ms. Nakanishi suffered minor cranial damage due to the impact and the scans showed no permanent damage. However, we can not fully assess the full damage until Ms. Nakanishi wakes up.”

“So, that means there could be something wrong with her?”

The doctor cleared his throat, “It’s hard to say right now. We will just have to wait until she wakes up.”

Kumi nodded in understanding, “Thank you, doctor.”

The doctor bowed and shot Kumi a sympathetic smile before leaving the room.

Kumi sighed and relaxed into her chair, “What am I going to do with you, Yuka?” She leaned forward, pushing aside the stray hairs that stuck to Yuka’s forehead.

The second time Yuka opened her eyes, she was alone, the only sound the rhythmic beeping of the machine next to her. She groaned and gripped at her head, the dull throbbing was still present as ever and her entire body ached as if she decided to run an eight mile marathon last minute.

Against her better judgment she tried to sit up and winced before falling back onto the hard bed. ‘Bad idea number two’, she thought to herself, ‘the first bad idea being whatever I did to have me end up in here’. She couldn’t exactly remember what she could have done to end up here, in fact the last thing she remembered was boarding the bus to go to class. Did she end up in some kind of accident?

“Oh, you’re awake,” The nurse looked surprised when she entered the room to see a conscious Yuka, “Let me go get the doctor.”

“Wai-” Yuka tried to call out, but the nurse had slammed the door shut and was probably half way down the hallway already. Yuka sighed and stared up at the white ceiling, thousands of questions swimming around in her head.

“Ah, Ms. Nakanishi. Good to see you awake.” A man, who Yuka assumed was the doctor, walked in, “How are you feeling?”

“Like I got run over by a truck.”

The doctor let out a light chuckle before reaching for Yuka’s chart at the foot of her bed, “That’s not far from what happened.”

“I got run over by a truck?!” Yuka yelled before wincing, it wasn’t one of the wisest things to yell while harboring the worst headache ever.

“Oh no, no. It was just a minor car accident.”

Yuka frowned, “Who’s car?”

The doctor looked up from her chart, “Yours, I believe.”

Yuka’s frown deepened as she thought about all the insurance paperwork she would have to fill out after she left and how much the repairs would cos- “Wait a minute,” Yuka scrunched her eyebrows together in confusion, “I don’t own a car.”

The doctor hummed, tapping his pen against the paper, “Perhaps I was mistaken then. It must have been your girlfriend’s car then.”

Yuka let out a breath of relief, as horrible as it sounded, at least that meant she wouldn’t have to be the one filling out all that paperwork and paying for those repair cos- “Wait a minute,” Yuka repeated, “I don’t have a girlfriend.”

The doctor stopped his tapping and looked at Yuka, confused, “Ms. Nakanishi, do you know what year it is?”

Yuka scoffed, “Of course I know what year it is, it’s 2011.”

The man simply grunted and jotted down more notes onto Yuka’s chart.

“I don’t understand, what’s wrong?” Yuka was starting to question this man’s credibility, what kind of doctor was he if he didn’t even know what year it was?

The doctor didn’t look up from the clipboard until a quiet, polite knock finally lifted his head up, “Ah, that should be the nurse with Ms. Yagami. Come in.”

“Ms. Yagami?” Yuka repeated, confused.

Two people entered the room, the first one wearing the usual nurse uniform while the second one was a slightly younger looking female who was wearing casual clothes. The one in the uniform stood next to the doctor, a neutral expression on her face, while the other rushed over to Yuka’s side, startling her.

“Yuka! Are you alright? How are you feeling?” She gripped at Yuka’s hands with hers.

“Uh? Do I know you?” Yuka asked, shifting her hands out of the strangers grip. Now she really was questioning the doctor and the strange people he brought in to see her.

The girl looked scandalized at Yuka’s question and reaction, she turned towards the doctor, “Doctor?”

The doctor coughed into his hands and set Yuka’s chart down, “Ms. Yagami, if you could please have a seat? It seems some…complications have arisen.”

“Complications?” Kumi asked, taking the seat next to Yuka’s bed. Yuka moved over towards the edge of the bed not wanting to be anywhere near the strange girl.

“Yes, Ms. Nakanishi, if you don’t mind telling us, what is the last thing you remember doing?”

Yuka looked up at the ceiling in thought, “The last thing I remember I was getting onto the bus to go to class.”

“Class?” Kumi questioned, “Yuka, you graduated years ago.”

“No I didn’t. I still have another year before I get my degree.” Yuka corrected, who was this girl trying to correct her about her own life?

The doctor nodded his head and picked up Yuka’s chart again. Yuka wondered how many more times he would repeat this action, she decided she would keep a count from now on, “I see. Do you happen to know who this young lady over here is and her relation to you?” He motioned towards Kumi.

“You remember don’t you, Yuka?” Her voice was borderline pleading and Yuka felt a small wave of guilt rush over her.

“I’m sorry, I don’t. I’m assuming we’re friends though, right?” Yuka offered, she had hoped that including the last part would pillow the negative of her not remembering the other girl.

Despite Yuka’s best efforts, it didn’t work, and Kumi made a face that looked like she was about to burst into tears any second.

The man simply nodded again and scanned Yuka’s chart with his eyes, “It seems like you have a case of retrograde Amnesia, Ms. Nakanishi.”

“Amnesia?” Kumi asked before Yuka could even open her own mouth to do so.

“Yes,” The doctor set the chart down, Yuka made sure to add one point in her head, “Ms. Nakanishi, if you don’t mind telling me what the year is again?”

“2010.”

Kumi’s face told Yuka all she needed to know.

“The year is 2014, Ms. Nakanishi.”

“You don’t remember anything that’s happened in the past 4 years, Yuka?” Kumi asked, her voice desperate.

Yuka shook her head, a little shocked at this revelation. 4 years had passed by her and she couldn’t remember any of it at all, “Is there anyway for me to get my memory back?”

The doctor looked grim as he shook his head, “I’m afraid that right now there is no medical way to solve this. It’ll have to just come naturally to you.”

“Naturally? But this is 4 years of my life I can’t remember! 4 years is a long time to forget. I mean what do I even do? Am I even friends with the same people anymore?” Yuka looked desperately at the doctor, maybe if she really begged he would surprise her with some kind of cure all medicine that he’s been hiding.

Unfortunately for Yuka, the doctor didn’t break into a laugh and give her a shot of some kind of potion that would restore her memories, instead his face stayed grim, “I’m sorry, Ms. Nakanishi.”

“Don’t worry, Yuka, I’ll try my hardest to help you remember.” Kumi added in, nodding her head in determination.

Yuka looked over at the other girl and for once in the span of 15 minutes that she knew her, she was thankful that Kumi was here, “Thank you.”

The doctor cleared his throat, “It seems that aside from your memory loss, you should be clear to go home today, Ms. Nakanishi.”

Well at least she could go be miserable in the comfort of her own home.

The man spoke quietly with the nurse for a few minutes before turning his attention back to the two girls, “I’ll go get started on the paperwork for that and bring it back here for you to sign,” He addressed Kumi, “I take it you’ll be taking care of her for the time being?”

Kumi simply nodded in response.

“Excuse me then.” The doctor said before opening the door and leaving, the nurse following closely behind him.

“I’m sorry I don’t remember you.” Yuka said, breaking the awkward silence that had hung between the two of them.

Kumi shook her head, “No, it’s fine. It’s not your fault.” She said with a small smile.

Yuka smiled back, now that she had a closer look she realized that the other girl was actually quite cute. Yuka coughed into her hand, now wasn’t the time to start thinking about cute girls, “So, I take it I was right and that we’re friends, right?”

Kumi looked to the side, “Something like that.”

Yuka hummed and sat up slightly, she wanted to know about this girl and more about the old her, “We must be really close for you to volunteer to take care of me. What’s happened to my parents?”

“Your parents…they’ve uh,” Kumi struggled with finding the right words.

“Are they alright?” Worry made it’s way to Yuka’s face as she sat up a little straighter.

Kumi waved her hand with a small chuckle, “Oh no, they’re fine and healthy, it’s just that…You don’t really talk to them anymore.”

“I don’t?” Yuka cocked her head to the side, “I thought my relationship with my parents was always good.”

Kumi made a noise, she wasn’t exactly fond of lying to Yuka, well technically she wasn’t lying she was just stretching the truth a little. It was true that Yuka and her parents had a falling out, but the circumstances weren’t really one of mutual understanding.

“Okay, Ms. Nakanishi,” The door opened and the doctor walked into the room, a pile of papers in his hands with the nurse quietly shuffling in behind him, “Here are the papers you need to sign and then you can go home.” The doctor split the stack in half before handing them over to Yuka.

Home. Yuka wondered if she still lived in the same house or if she had moved somewhere else.

“These are for you,” He handed the other half to Kumi who took them with a grateful smile and immediately started to flip through the pages.

Yuka turned towards her own papers, the font was microscopic and the Yuka wondered why they even bothered making font that tiny. She flipped through the pages, not even bothering to fully read the words and quickly signed wherever she was required to. She cheered herself on as she got to the last page in under 3 minutes and quickly signed her name one last time before pushing the papers away from her with a victorious smile.

“Finished?” The doctor asked. Yuka nodded and handed the papers up to the doctor. She glanced over at the other girl who was chewing on her top lip and carefully reading through the papers.

Yuka leaned forward and gently nudged Kumi, “You don’t have to actually read it you know,” Yuka whispered, keeping her voice low so the doctor wouldn’t hear her, “They just put a whole bunch of nonsense in there.”

Kumi chuckled and for a split second Yuka thought it was a rather cute laugh that she wanted to hear more of, “Well you never know, I could be signing over your kidneys and you would never know,”

“Can they actually do that?” Yuka asked, horrified.

Kumi shrugged, “Who knows, but I would rather read to make sure you get to keep all your internal organs.”

Yuka turned back to the doctor, trying her hardest to keep a serious face, she cleared her throat, “Er, can I see those papers again?” Yuka decided it was better to be safe than sorry.

______

“Is this where I live now?” Yuka asked in amazement once the two had stopped in front of an unfamiliar, white house.

Kumi simply nodded, fishing around in her jacket pocket for the house key, “We live together.”

“This is new,” Yuka said, glancing around the area. It seemed the be a relatively nice suburban area, “How long have we lived together?”

Kumi pulled the key out and unlocked the door before pushing it open, “Just a year.”

Yuka stepped into the house after the other girl. It was rather small inside, only housing a tiny kitchen that was connected to the living room and off to the side were two closed doors. Yuka looked at the doors, quizzically, she assumed one of them led to the bathroom while the other one was a bedroom; but if there was only bedroom, then where did she sleep?

Just as Yuka was about to ask, Kumi beat her to it, “I guess I should probably tell you this now,” She shrugged her coat off, draping it over one of the chairs, “We’re more than just close friends.”

Suddenly it all clicked together for Yuka, “O-Oh, so we’re…”

“Dating.” Kumi finished for the other girl with a sheepish smile, “Sorry, I wanted to tell you earlier, but I thought it would be better to tell you in private.”

Yuka nodded, this was definitely new. Kumi was her girlfriend. This girl that she knew nothing about was her girlfriend, “How long?”

“Two years,” Kumi answered, taking a seat on the couch.

Two years, Yuka was dumbstruck. She still couldn’t believe it. Yesterday she was happily living off by herself and now she had a girlfriend of two years that she was living with. “Wow,” Yuka took a seat next to Kumi, making sure to leave a good couple of inches between the two of them.

Yuka looked over the other girl who was mindlessly playing with the hem of her shirt. She decided to look on the bright side, at least her new, not so new found girlfriend was cute.

“H-How did we…meet?” Yuka questioned curiously.

“I was a freshmen in college,” Kumi smiled softly down at her hands, “And you had just started teaching,” She chuckled, “It was all really cliché really. I always stared at you in class and you always paid extra attention to me. You asked me out when the semester ended.”

Yuka smiled as well, “I sound smooth.”

Kumi let out a small laugh, looking up at the older girl, “You were,” She turned her attention back to her lap, “You asked me to move in with you after you…” She paused, gripping the end of her shirt tightly.

“After I?” Yuka looked at the younger girl quizzically, confused by her sudden behavior change.

“After you…moved out of your apartment,” Kumi let out a forced laugh, “I couldn’t say no after you already bought this house. You were always making impulsive decisions. It’s one of the things I love…and hate about you.” Kumi stood up from the couch and stretched her arms out, “Enough about that. Are you hungry?”

Yuka nodded, surprised at how fast Kumi changed the subject. She still had millions of other questions she wanted to ask, but judging from the other girl’s reaction, she decided it would be best if she kept them to herself for now.

______

After Kumi had left for her classes Yuka decided to go out and explore for a bit. She wondered around aimlessly for what seemed like hours until she stopped at a small cafe, deciding to relax for a bit before her long trek back home.

“Welcome!” A short, stubby man wiping down one of the numerous tables shouted at Yuka, a large smile on his face.

“Ah, hello,” Yuka greeted back, surprised by the sudden noise.

“You can order up at that counter,” The man pointed before resuming his work.

“Thanks,” Yuka said, walking up to the counter.

Behind the counter stood a single girl with her back turned towards Yuka, it looked like she was playing around with something on the table.

Yuka cleared her throat, “Uh, excuse me?”

The girl quickly turned around, dropping a couple of coffee beans on the floor, “Ah, sorry-” When her eyes met Yuka’s her demeanor quickly changed, the smile fell from her face replaced with a scowl, she crossed her arms and narrowed her eyes at Yuka, “What are you doing here?”

“…Ordering coffee?” Yuka was taken aback by the sudden change, “Do I know you or something?”

The girl opened her mouth before quickly closing it. She looked just as surprised as Yuka did “No,” She answered after a few seconds, the smile making it’s way back to her face, “It’s been a long day is all. What can I get you?”

“Okay…” Yuka looked up at the signboard that hung above, dismissing the girl’s odd behavior for now, “I’ll have a cappuccino,” She ordered the first thing that caught her eye, not knowing what the other beverages were.

“One cappuccino,” The girl said to herself and turned around quickly getting to work.

Yuka stared at the girl’s back as she busied herself with the machines. It was obvious that the two knew each other, but she couldn’t quite place her anywhere. Then again, if Yuka had met her during the four years she lost, it would make sense she couldn’t remember her. She sighed, why was this girl trying to hide that they knew each other?

“Here you go,” The girl placed the paper cup filled with the hot liquid in front of Yuka.

“Are you sure I don’t know you?” Yuka asked again in the small hope that the girl would drop the act and reveal who she was for Yuka’s sake.

The girl stared at Yuka’s face and rubbed her chin with her free hand in mock thought, “Nah, I would’ve definitely remembered someone like you,” She said with a grin before turning her attention to the register, “That’ll be 2.20”

Yuka reached into her pocket and pulled out the correct amount of money before taking her coffee, she shot one more glance at the coffee girl before turning for the exit.

“Have a good day!” The girl called, large smile on her face.

______

“I’m home,” Kumi announced, closing the front door behind her.

Yuka looked up from the random crossword puzzle she was working on, “Welcome home.”

Kumi dropped her bag onto the couch and walked over to Yuka, looking over her shoulder at the puzzle, “How was your day today?” She asked before turning her attention to the mail in her hands.

“I met this really interesting girl at the coffee shop today,” Yuka hadn’t meant to say it but thoughts of

the coffee shop girl had been swirling around in her head all day, she had to tell someone and it had just so happened that the only person she could tell was Kumi.

“Oh?” Kumi seemed uninterested as she shifted through the envelopes in her hand before throwing them onto the table, “You like coffee now?”

Yuka made a face, “No, I was just bored sitting around waiting for you. We talked for a bit, it was…fun.” Fun would be the last thing Yuka would call their conversation earlier but Kumi wouldn’t know if she stretched the truth a little.

This seemed to perk Kumi’s interest, “Oh?” She repeated, an unamused smile making it’s way to her face, “What was her name again?”

Yuka frowned, “She hasn’t told me…at least not yet.”

Kumi tried to hide the small scowl that had graced her lips, but Yuka could clearly see it from where she sat, “That’s too bad.” Her words suggested sympathy but her tone screamed the opposite.

Yuka nodded in agreement, making it her goal to get the coffee shop girl’s name the next time she saw her thinking that if she got her name there might be the odd chance she would remember her.

“Yuka,” Kumi took a seat next to the older girl and leaned onto her shoulder, “I have a free day tomorrow,” Kumi took Yuka’s hand with hers, mindlessly playing with her fingers, “We should go on a date.”

“A date?” Yuka gulped, still not used to the sudden intimacy.

Kumi nodded against the other girl’s chest, “We haven’t spent time together in a long time, just the two of us.”

“We haven’t?”

“No,” Kumi stopped playing with Yuka’s fingers and instead opted to play with the buttons on Yuka’s sweater instead, “You were busy with your work, and I was finishing up finals. We hardly had any time together.”

Yuka was conflicted, on one hand she wanted to make her girlfriend happy, but on the other hand she really wanted to see the coffee shop girl again. Yuka sighed and put on her best smile, “Okay,” She knew she would never hear the end of it if she refused, “Let’s go on a date tomorrow.”

“Really?” Kumi smiled up at Yuka and for a fraction of a nanosecond Yuka swore she could have felt her heart skip a beat.

Yuka nodded before quickly looking away, “Y-Yeah.”

“Ah, I’m excited now,” Kumi stretched out onto the couch, laying her head on Yuka’s lap, “What should we do?”

“Whatever you want,” Yuka replied simply, head still turned away.

Kumi hummed and reached her hand up, turning Yuka’s head to look at her, “Let’s get coffee then,” Her smile was innocent, but the glint in her eyes said otherwise.

______

Yuka closed her eyes, inhaling the scent of coffee. What was she doing here?

Kumi had left for her classes and Yuka was alone at the house, bored and somehow that all lead to her ending up at the same coffee shop again.

After Kumi and Yuka had their date here yesterday without meeting the coffee shop girl, Yuka told herself she would stop going before it seemed borderline stalkerish. She couldn’t help it though, this girl knew something and Yuka was determined to find out what it was. Thoughts of the coffee shop girl had plagued her all last night and Yuka brushed it off as determination to finding out who she really was.

“Ah! You again?” The girl said with a large smile, “I didn’t think I would see you again so soon.”

“I guess I can’t stop myself from a good cup of coffee,” Yuka chuckled nervously, looking up at the signboard despite already knowing what she was going to order, “I’ll have a cappuccino.” She made a face, recalling the horrible, bitter taste that wouldn’t leave her mouth for hours.

“Gotchu!” The girl saluted before turning around and working on Yuka’s drink.

Yuka chuckled at the girl’s childlike response, “Cute,” She said under her breath before quickly slapping a hand over her mouth, hoping the other girl hadn’t heard her. That was not what she had meant to say.

“Hm?” The girl lifted her head from her work. The small smile on her face already told Yuka she had heard.

“I-I uh…I said…” Yuka stumbled over her words, not knowing how she would cover this up.

Thankfully, the girl seemed to pity Yuka and her pitiful stuttering and handed her, her finished drink,

“2.20”

Yuka quickly reached into her pocket and pulled out the money she had already set aside for the coffee before handing it over to the coffee girl, “What’s your name?” The words had slipped out of Yuka’s mouth before she could stop them.

“Yuria,” The girl said with a grin as if she was expecting the question

“Yuria,” Yuka repeated, that name didn’t bring back any memories at all, maybe the other girl was telling the truth after all. She sighed and took a tentative sip of the coffee before instantly regretting it. She tried her best to suppress a gag and swallowed the liquid with a small smile as to not seem suspicious.

“What about yours?” Kumi asked.

“My what?” Yuka swallowed again, the vile taste spreading around her mouth.

“Your name,” She giggled into her hand, “I told you mine so it’s only fair if you tell me yours.”

“O-Oh, right!” Yuka felt the heat rising up to her face from embarrassment, “Yuka.”

“Yuka,” Yuria echoed, “Yuka, Yuka, Yuka. Nice name.” She smiled, extending her hand out towards Yuka, “Nice to make your acquaintance.”

Yuka set her coffee down and grasped Yuka’s hand with hers, hoping the other girl wouldn’t notice how sweaty her palms were, “Nice to meet you, Yuria.”

______

“Yuria.” That was the first word that had left her mouth when she came home and spotted Kumi diligently working on something at the kitchen table.

Kumi’s grip on the papers in her hands tensed, she looked up at Yuka and immediately loosened her grip when she noticed the older girl looking at her curiously, “Huh?”

“That’s her name,” Yuka tried to suppress the smile she knew was making it’s way to her face. She wasn’t particularly happy about meeting Yuria, Yuka told herself, she was just happy to get to talk to someone who wasn’t Kumi. She loved talking to Kumi however after a week of only talking to the other girl was starting to get a little mundane.

“Who’s?” Kumi asked, but the hard edge in her voice suggested she already knew who.

“The girl from the coffee shop,” Yuka wasn’t trying to brag, or maybe she was, all she wanted was to voice her excitement. She wanted to yell it to all her friends, unfortunately, it just so happened that her only friend right now was Kumi…and hopefully Yuria soon.

“Oh,” Kumi cleared her throat and shuffled the papers into a neat pile and set them back onto the table, “You saw her today?”

Yuka nodded, the dumb smile present on her face. She slid her jacket off and hung it on one of the empty hooks, “I think you would like her.”

“I really doubt that.”

Yuka turned around surprised, Kumi was standing a few inches behind her, she hadn’t even heard the younger girl get up, “What are you-” Yuka’s words were cut short by Kumi pressing her lips against hers.

Yuka broke the kiss, gently pushing Kumi away, “What are you doing?”

Kumi pouted, stepping closer to the taller girl, “I’m allowed to kiss my girlfriend, aren’t I?”

“I-It’s not that, you just caught me off guard and-”

Kumi leaned in, causing Yuka to take another step back, “Can I kiss you?”

Yuka shifted her gaze, embarrassed at the thoughts that were running through her mind, “O-Okay.”

Kumi wasted no time in pressing her lips against Yuka’s again, wrapping her arms around the taller girl’s neck. Yuka closed her eyes and hesitantly returned the kiss, moving her lips against Kumi’s.

It wasn’t until Yuka felt Kumi gently pulling at her shirt that she broke away from the kiss again, face flushed and breathing uneven, “W-What are you doing?”

“What does it look like I’m doing?” Kumi asked, frustrated with the numerous buttons on Yuka’s shirt. She eventually gave up, and lifted her own shirt above her head before throwing it off to the side.

Yuka quickly averted her gaze, shocked at Kumi’s bold actions, “I-I don’t think we should be doing this.”

Kumi brought her hand up to Yuka’s cheek and gently turned her head to look at her. Yuka swallowed hard, trying her best to keep her eyes focused on the wall behind Kumi and not on the topless girl in front of her. “Yuka,” Kumi trailed her hand down Yuka’s arm to grip at her hand. She moved closer and pulled Yuka’s hand to cup at her own breast, “Please.” She whined, her voice desperate.

Yuka felt her heart pound in her chest and the sight of the younger girl in front of her. She didn’t know what came over her, but she leaned forward, capturing Kumi’s lips with hers in a heated kiss, squeezing the younger girl’s cloth covered breast with her hand, earning her a soft whimper.

“Just once,” Yuka whispered against the other girl’s lips, her voice hoarse with desire. She pushed Kumi up against the wall behind her, feeling her warm body pressed up against hers, “Just once.”

Kumi nodded against Yuka’s neck, gripping the back of Yuka’s shirt between her fingers, “Just once.”

______

When Yuka woke up the next morning, she was alone. She stretched out and lifted herself up, glancing around the room she noticed Kumi’s bag was gone. Yuka laid back down and concluded that she was probably off to school. Yuka smirked to herself, with Kumi gone that meant she could go see Yuria without having a million questions thrown at her. Yuka stumbled out of the bed and made her way towards the bathroom.

Yuka shivered when the cold January air hit her face as she left the apartment complex. As she started walking, her mind wandered. A couple of days had since passed by since her accident and despite Kumi’s best efforts at trying to help her, the majority of the four years was a giant question mark to her and her relationship with Kumi was all over the place. Yuka sighed to herself, “What am I doing?” She muttered to herself quietly. She knew that these continued meetings with Yuria did nothing to help her relationship, but seeing the other girl made Yuka feel something she couldn’t quite put her finger on. Rather, Yuria had piqued her interests.

“Welcome!” One of the baristas sweeping the floor greeted as soon as Yuka stepped foot into the cafe.

Yuka gave a curt nod and stepped towards the counter where a smiling Yuria was waiting for her.

“Come to see me again?” Yuria teased.

“No, I just like the coffee here,” Yuka teased back, pulling her wallet out.

Yuria hummed and grabbed one of the paper cups before turning around to start preparing Yuka’s drink.

“You didn’t even ask what I wanted.”

“A cappuccino, right?” Kumi shot a confident smile over her shoulder, “You’ve ordered it every time you come in.”

Yuka coughed into her hand, embarrassed, she had to make sure to order something different next time she came, “Er, yeah.”

Kumi turned back to her work, “Do you work around here?”

Yuka shook her head, she didn’t even know where she worked but she decided to omit that part out, “I live close by.” With my loving girlfriend who’s done nothing but care for me despite my memory handicap, yet here I am talking up another girl instead of waiting for her to come home. Yuka decided to omit that part out as well.

Yuria nodded, “I live close by too,” She turned around, handing the hot cup Yuka, “I’m surprised I’ve never seen you around here before.”

“Y-Yeah, I don’t leave my house often.” Yuka cursed herself as soon as the words left her mouth, now she probably seemed like a weird shut in. If Yuria thought it was weird, she didn’t show any signs of it on her face and Yuka breathed out, taking the cup from Kumi, “Well, bye then.” She turned on her heel desperate to leave.

“Wait,” Yuria called out causing Yuka to turn back around, “Will I see you tomorrow?”

“There is a high possibility that you might.” She called back before leaving the cafe, a wide smile on her face. She sipped at her coffee before making a face, in all her excitement she forgot that she didn’t even like coffee.

______

Yuka plopped down onto the bed, glancing over at the clock. She was only out for an hour and a half and Kumi didn’t usually come home for another 4 hours. She stared up at the ceiling for a few minutes before closing her eyes and letting sleep eventually wash over her.

“What do you think about that one?” Yuka pointed to an especially extravagant ring in the display case.

The girl standing next to Yuka waved her hand in dismissal, “Too big and flashy. Kumi doesn’t like stuff like that,” She clicked her tongue, “How is it that I know your girlfriend better than you?”

“Because you’ve known her longer than me. What about that one?” Yuka pointed at another ring that was much smaller and simpler.

The girl placed a hand under her chin in thought, “I think that should be fine,”

Yuka called the clerk over, “I’d like this, please.”

The clerk nodded and opened her mouth but Yuka couldn’t hear the words that were coming out. She leaned in closer, “What was that?”

“I said, is it just me or has Kumi been acting weird lately?” Yuka blinked, the clerk in front of her was gone, instead the girl she was talking to earlier sat in front of her.

“How so?” The words automatically slipped out of Yuka’s mouth.

“She doesn’t seem herself anymore. I thought the two of you had gotten into a fight or something,” The girl shook her head and took a small bite of her salad, “Maybe it’s just me.”

Yuka closed her eyes. She could feel Kumi’s hard gaze on her as she apologized profusely, “I can’t do this anymore, Yuka.”

Yuka gripped Kumi’s arm tightly, “Kumi, please. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.” Tears flowed down Yuka’s eyes, blurring her vision, “I don’t love her, I swear. I-I don’t know what came over me.”

Kumi didn’t waver, her eyes cold, “You already made your choice.” She slipped the ring off her finger and placed it in Yuka’s hand before turning around towards the door.

“Yuka?”

Yuka opened her eyes, she was sprawled out on bed.

“Yuka.” The voice repeated firmer.

Yuka turned her head to the side, a figure laid next to her, “Yuria.”

Yuria shifted closer to the older girl, running a hand down Yuka’s cheek, “Yuka.”

She leaned forward but Yuka stopped her. Yuria looked at her questioningly. “We shouldn’t do this. I’m engaged.”

Yuria laid a light kiss against Yuka’s neck, “Please,” Yuria pressed her body against Yuka’s, “Just once.”

Yuka closed her eyes and entangled one hand in Yuria’s hair, pulling the girl down and meeting her lips in a kiss, “Just once.”

“What do you think you’re doing?”

Yuka opened her eyes, the girl from before was in front of her again, “Mizuki, I-” The words left her mouth without her even knowing.

“You better stay away from her, Yuka.”

“I can’t, I-I made a mistake, but I only love her-”

“Don’t you dare!” Mizuki yelled, she raised her hand and slapped Yuka hard against the face. Yuka stumbled back a bit from the force, surprised. Students walking aimlessly around the campus stopped and watched the scene unfold before them. “Stay the hell away from her.” She spat before walking away.

“What do you want?”

Yuka blinked, her vision was blurry, “Kumi, I’m sorry.” She slurred into the phone, tears stinging at her eyes.

“Are you drunk?” Her previously cold tone turned into worry, “Yuka, where are you?”

“I-I’m gonna come see you,” Yuka clumsily started the ignition.

“Yuka, stop.” Yuka could hear the rustling of clothes in the background, “Where are you?”

Yuka rested her heavy head against the steering wheel, “I’m so sorry,” She repeated, over and over again.

“I forgive you, alright?” Kumi whispered gently, “Just please, don’t drive, okay? Don’t go anywhere.”

Yuka picked her head back up, her motivation coming back to her, “I want to see you.”

“I’ll find you, okay?” Kumi’s voice was strained.

Yuka took her foot off the break, she knew Kumi was lying, she wouldn’t come see her. She was just making excuses, “I’m coming to you,” Yuka focused all her attention on keeping her voice from faltering.

“Yuka!” Kumi yelled over the phone, her voice turning frantic, “Stop, don’t you-”

Yuka pressed the end button and threw the phone in the backseat. She pulled out of the parking lot, ignoring the constant vibrating that came from her phone.

“Yuka!”

Yuka opened her eyes, her breathing heavy. She gripped at her chest and glanced around the room. She was back in her room.

The door opened and Kumi poked her head in, “Oh, you’re home.” Kumi stepped into the room, throwing her bag down on the floor, “Are you okay? You’re sweating.”

Yuka brought a hand to her face. She inhaled and exhaled slowly, her heart was still beating fast against her chest. She remembered.

“Do you not feel well?” Kumi asked, her face concerned. She walked towards Yuka, placing the back of her hand against her forehead.

Yuka shook her head, “I’m fine,” She struggled to keep her voice steady, “I just had a bad dream is all.”

Kumi nodded, too tired to bother asking any further, “I’m going to shower, okay? I brought you food.” The younger girl said, squeezing Yuka’s shoulder lightly before leaving the room.

Inhale. Exhale. She remembered. Yuka buried her head into her hands, “Oh god,” She muttered quietly to herself. Before she was so desperate to get her memories back, but now that she had them back she wished that they would leave again. Yuka raised her head. That coffee shop girl. Yuria. She knew her all along. Yuka knew there was something off about her from the minute they had met. Yuka threw the covers off her body. She couldn’t tell Kumi she remembered, not now at least, it seemed like while she was in this state of ignorance, Kumi forgave her. She wondered if Kumi would continue to stay with her if she pretended to never remember.

No, that wasn’t right. She had to tell Kumi she remembered eventually, so that the two of them could talk this out. But first she had to confront Yuria about this.

She walked out of the room and into the entrance hallway where her jacket hanged. She reached into the left pocket, feeling the cool piece of metal that laid inside it. She closed her eyes and clenched her fist around the ring. It was real.

______

When Yuka woke up the next day she was surprised to see Kumi next to her for once.

“You don’t have class today?” Yuka was a little disappointed since this meant she couldn’t go see Yuria like she had planned without Kumi knowing what she was doing.

“…starts at one,” Kumi mumbled into her pillow, eyes still closed and half asleep.

“Oh,” Yuka swallowed, “Uhh..”

Kumi opened one eye, “What’s wrong?”

Yuka shifted her gaze, “I-I was just wondering,” She took a deep breath, “Can I hold you?” Yuka mentally slapped herself, that was not what she wanted to say at all but the words fell from her mouth anyways.

Kumi looked just as surprised as Yuka did but despite her shock the younger girl nodded and moved closer, draping her arm around the older girl’s waist, “You’re going to see her, aren’t you?”

Yuka nodded, hesitating before bringing her hand up to the back of Kumi’s head, absentmindedly playing with the strands of her hair.

“Don’t leave me,” Kumi pleaded quietly against Yuka’s neck, tightening her grip on Yuka’s shirt, “Not again.” Yuka stayed silent, listening to the girl’s uneven breaths.

She pressed a light kiss against Kumi’s temple, “I won’t,” Yuka inhaled sharply, feeling the guilt weigh down on her chest.

By the time Kumi had left for her class it was already half past one. Yuka sighed, it had taken a lot of effort to get the younger girl to even get out of bed. She smiled dumbly, despite the cold wind that whipped away relentlessly at her face she still felt warm.

“Welcome!” The same barista from yesterday greeted as soon as Yuka stepped foot into the cafe.

“Good morning,” Yuka greeted back with a small smile.

She walked up to the counter where Yuria was waiting for her with a large grin, “You came.”

“Yuria,” Yuka dropped the smile, her tone serious, “Why didn’t you tell me?”

Yuria cocked her head to the side in confusion, “Tell you what?”

Yuka lowered her voice, “That you knew who I was. That we…you know…had an-”

“Affair?” Yuria finished with a small smirk.

Yuka glanced over at the barista a few inches away who was trying his hardest to pretend he wasn’t listening in, “When do you get off work?”

“Why?” Yuria followed Yuka’s eyes to her co-worker who was stumbling around with the broom, “Planning on seducing me again?”

“Stop,” Yuka hissed, “I just want to talk to you, privately.”

Yuria looked happy despite the frown on her face, “Fine, I get out at two.”

Yuka nodded, looking down at her watch, “I’ll wait for you then, okay?”

“Okay,” Yuria fiddled with the stack of paper cups, “Do you want me to make you something? Cappuccino?” She offered, this time with a genuine smile.

Yuka shook her head, grateful that at least she could at least drop the act, “I don’t like coffee.”

______

“Yuka?”

Yuka perked up from her position on the couch, “Welcome home,”

Kumi dropped her bag on the floor and slipped her jacket off, hanging it up next to Yuka’s.

“Kumi, I think we should talk.” Yuka said in the strongest voice she could muster.

The younger girl kept her back turned to Yuka, her hands still on her jacket, “About?”

“Our relationship.” Yuka clenched her fist, feeling her nails dig into her skin.

“What about it?” Kumi’s voice wavered as she spoke.

Yuka unclenched her fist, her palm red and sore, “I think you already know.”

Kumi turned around to face Yuka, tears already streaking down her face, “You’re leaving me for her again, aren’t you?”

“What did you want to talk about?” Yuria asked, taking a seat on one of her chairs. The two had left the cafe and headed to Yuria’s apartment as it was closer.

Yuka cleared her throat, “How come you didn’t tell me we met before after you knew I had amnesia?”

Yuria smiled sadly, “I was really happy when I first saw you again, you know? Well I didn’t act like it but I thought you were coming to tell me you wanted to get back together.” She swallowed, “But when I found out you didn’t remember, I was even happier. I know that sounds messed up, but I thought like this we could start over again, that this time you would fall in love with me first,” Yuria paused, “I can still hope, can’t I?”

Yuka stared at the younger girl sympathetically, it seemed like she couldn’t even breathe without hurting someone, “I’m sorry, Yuria. It’s never going to happen again, though.”

“Then why are you here?”

Yuka was taken aback by the question, “W-What?” Why was she here? She didn’t even know the reason why herself. She had told herself it was because she wanted to hear the truth from Yuria herself, but after a while that seemed to make little sense to her.

“Why are you here, talking to me?” She repeated, a small smirk on her face, “You remembered what happened, so why did you need to confront me for?”

“I-I just wanted to talk,” Yuka stuttered, feeling her reservations start to break.

“If you never came to see me again, I wouldn’t have chased after you. Now you’re giving me a reason to.” Yuria chuckled, standing up from her seat, “Tell me,” She stepped towards Yuka, lowering her voice until it was above a whisper, “Tell me you don’t want me.”

Yuka lowered her eyes, clenching her jaw tightly, “I don’t want you,”

“Bullshit,” Yuria took another step, “I know you, Yuka. We’re the same. I understand you better than she ever will.” Her voice softened as she raised a hand to Yuka’s face, running her hand down her cheek, “She’s still with you because she thinks you’re going to change, but I know better, you’re never going to change and I accept that.”

“Stop,” Yuka tried her hardest to muster the strongest voice she could, but she could feel her walls collapsing.

“If you really loved her you would leave her before you hurt her more.” Yuria whispered, pressing her lips hard against Yuka’s. The other girl eagerly returned the kiss despite her conscious screaming at her not to. Yuria pulled away from the kiss, “You’re always going to want me, Yuka.” She breathed against her ear, “I have you wrapped around my finger,” She trailed light kisses down her neck, sucking at the skin.

Yuka closed her eyes,“Y-You’re wrong.”

“Oh?” Yuria stopped her movements, her eyes boring into Yuka’s, “Tell me you don’t want me again,” Yuria dragged her hands underneath’s Yuka’s shirt.

“I-” Yuka’s breath hitched as Yuria groped at one of her cloth covered breasts, “I want you.”

“I’m sorry, Kumi. I really am.” Yuka lowered her head, gripping at the fabric of her shirt, “But…I can’t help how I feel about her. She…She makes me feel all sorts of things I never imagined I could before,” A sad smile made it’s way to Yuka’s lips, “When I’m with her it feels like my heart is in overdrive a-and it gets kind of hard to breathe and I get so nervous I-I sometimes find it hard to think of the right words I want to say without sounding like an idiot. It feels like nothing else matters when I’m with her.” Yuka frowned, trying her hardest to maintain her composure It wasn’t a lie, she really did feel that way, but it wasn’t with Yuria.

Kumi wiped at her eyes with her sleeves and tried to smile although she couldn’t hold it for long, “I understand how you feel, Yuka.”

“You do?” Yuka raised her head.

“I do,” She confirmed, more tears falling from her eyes, “Because, it’s the same way I feel about you.”

“O-Oh.” Yuka was at a loss for words and it showed on her face. Please don’t make this harder for me.

“It’s not fair,” Kumi stood up straighter, “I met you first, we were friends first, I fell in love with you first, I had you first. I had you, Yuka. You don’t know how happy that made me. You were mine…and I was yours. I was always yours. Even when you were chasing after her, I never stopped being yours,” She didn’t even bother at wiping away her tears anymore and just let them freely fall down her face, “For this girl…to just come in and steal your heart without even trying. Do you know how bad this hurts?” Her voice cracked as her cries turned into sobs, “I had you.”

Yuka stood there as she watched Yuria drop to the floor, head buried in her hands. She desperately wanted to reach out and hold the other girl in her arms, but she didn’t know if she even had the right to comfort her anymore, “Kumi, I-”

“Don’t.” She tried her hardest to muster the strongest voice she could but Yuka could still hear the vulnerability in it, “Don’t apologize. You don’t deserve to apologize to try and make yourself feel better about this.” Her voice started to break again as the words left her mouth, “Please. Just leave. Just go be with her.”

Yuka reached a hand out but quickly retracted it, “Okay,” She said softly, her voice quivering. It took all the strength she had to turn on her heel and leave the room. ‘Do this for her’, Yuka told herself, wiping away at her own tears, ‘it’s for the best.’

Kumi didn’t move from her spot even as she heard the sound of the drawers opening and the rustling of clothes being hurriedly packed. She remained staring at the wall in front of her blankly, feeling the tears sting at her eyes even as she heard Yuka talk to someone quietly over the phone. Kumi told herself that Yuka would come back to her even as she watched Yuka’s retreating figure close the front door behind her. “Don’t leave me again, Yuka.” Kumi whimpered to the empty room.

______

“I take it, it didn’t go over so well?” Yuria asked as soon as Yuka entered the vehicle after throwing her bags in the back.

Yuka shot Yuria a look, prompting the younger girl to turn her head back to the dashboard and start the engine.

“Do you think I’m doing the right thing?” Yuka asked after a few minutes of silence had passed by.

Yuria shrugged her shoulders, “You shouldn’t ask me. I’m biased.” She grinned.

Yuka sighed and leaned back into her seat, “I don’t want to hurt her anymore.”

Yuria nodded in understanding.

“Sorry, you probably don’t want to hear all about this.”

“No, it’s okay. If it helps you then I don’t mind listening.”

Yuka shot the younger girl a thankful smile, “Maybe this whole amnesia thing was for the better. If I didn’t get it, I would’ve never left Kumi and I would’ve continued to hurt her over and over again.” Yuka leaned her head against the window, watching the street through the windshield, “She deserves better than me. I love her, but I can’t promise her that I’ll never stray.”

Yuria nodded again, “And what about me?”

“What about you?” Yuka glanced over at the other girl.

“What am I to you?” Yuria asked after a few minutes of silence.

Yuka chuckled dryly, “You’re the one I stray to.”

Yuria swallowed, her eyes focused on the road, “I’m glad though,” She smiled, taking one hand off the wheel and placing it over Yuka’s, “That you still chose me.”

Yuka gave the best smile she could muster, her other hand playing with the ring in her pocket, “Me too,” She closed her eyes, feeling the cold metal between her fingers. Yuka inhaled deeply and turned her face towards the window so Yuria wouldn’t see the tears that fell down her face.

‘I’m sorry, Kumi.’


End file.
